December 7 - A Ball of Spelling Stress

So here we are. I would like to inform you all of a little secret. For those of you who have read my blog more than once I will simply say that... what I am about it say may not come as a shock. I am not a great speller. I KNOW! Its hard to believe! What you dont know is that the poor spelling I miss is actually spelling that has made it through an immense amount of spell check. But I will tell you today... friends... followers... people who accidentally came upon this... I dont know where the spell check is on the updated version of blogspot. I KNOW I should have ignored the up date. If its not baroque dont fix it! And if you dont realize that that is not a spelling mistake but simply a wonderful reference to an academy award winning film then you shouldnt be reading this blog!

So, since I dont pre plan what I am going to write I will simply pre apologize for my spelling as it may take a turn for the worst until I figure out where the button is. I will be honest... even now at only paragraph 2... my page is covered in small red lines. Thats not a good sign people... not good at all!

I would like to talk about stress. Right now I have a great deal of stress in my life to the point that it is starting to flow over into everything. I try and de stress by listening to music, watching movies, and just basically trying to not let it fill my mind. As of right now, I dont have a place to live. I look on every website, I email and call people all the time. So far I have had no luck. None at all. As the stress levels increase I need to remind myself that I have to calm down and focus otherwise I will make needless mistakes. I also have 2 auditions coming up. 1 is one that I can take or leave. The other one is very important to me. The other day I said that I wouldnt tell you what the auditions were until after, and that is still the case, but I wanted to you to know how nervous I am.

Today I got an email from a man who I contacted about renting his apartment. It is downtown and fairly affordable. I asked why it was. He told me basically that he was a counselor and had to move for work, and because of the location he wanted to keep the place. He kept it low because he wasnt wanting to make money off it, just have good tenants who will care for the place. And then it happened. A word that sends up the biggest red flag I can think of. Where had he moved to that he couldnt meet with me to show me the place? Why NIGERIA of course! He said I was welcome to go and look at the place from the outside, and then if I was interested I could fill out the form and he would courier the keys to me. HOW SWEET OF HIM. I think its the same guy who 2 years ago was actually a price. He sent me an email saying that if I let him keep money in my accounts he would pay me an even million dollars. What? He emailed you too? WHAT!?!?! So... are you telling me I might NOT get to live in the $800 per month furnished apartment in downtown Toronto that belongs to a Nigerian prince? DAMNIT! I had such high hopes.

Tomorrow I perform with a really funny show. Friends of mine have taken the time out of their day to invite people to the show, which is nice. Im looking forward to seeing how my characters do in a new city. Will they be funny? will people hate it? From what I have seen in my time watching improv, sketch, and comedy in Toronto is that I am no where near as bad as the worst guy... and right now... thats what I am looking for. I dont need to be the best yet... but I do need to be better than the worst.

The diet is going well people. Turns out high stress in conducive to weight loss. Who would have guessed!? From what I can tell from the small scale in my room and the pain in my stomach from crunches is that I am nearing my goal weight closer and closer every day. When I looked today it appeared that I am down about 23lbs, which for me is great. I knew once I stopped eating like a fatty that the weight would drop a lot and fast, and now I am prepared for the slow loss now. I am prepared and will not mourn its loss. I may have a funeral for it.. and to be honest... FUCK I hope its catered by Hagen Daaz. Is that wrong? it feels like that should be wrong.

So tomorrow morning to go and see yet another apartment. Hopefully this one isnt a tiny shit heap at a high price. Thats all I ask! Not an expensive shit heap in the middle of nowhere! Gosh Im needy. He mike what kind of car do you want? Ummmm one that doesnt break down? WOAH! needy much?

Anyways, since I must to the world of apartments in the A.M. I shall be off. I apologize that this blog came late yet again. What was I doing? Something busy or important? Nope.. watching season 2 of Big Bang Theory. Thats all. Sorry for the delay.

Tomorrow I shall tell you all about tomorrows performance. Wish me luck!

Thanks for reading!

Mike

November 21 - Food, movies, and dinosaurs

Here we are again.

Yet another late entry into the world of blogs.

What shall we chat about today? Lets chat about the health front. I think it may be time for Mr Delamont to head down and perhaps purchase some glasses. I have astigmatism and normally its okay, but it has gotten worse. My eyes get tired and I get head aches. Of course today I spent 7 hours working in front of a computer, then saw a movie and am now blogging and after that I plan to read the new GQ. The doctor says that i should do less of all of that... I suppose i could try.

Do you know what is refreshing? A tall drink of water! Do you know what is not entertaining, delicious or enjoyable? A tall drink of water! What do you call a handsome man standing at the bar? Steve, but there is no time for that. FOCUS! all I drink is water. No juice, no coffee, no pop, no nothing! (minus the odd pint) I have stopped drinking the sugar stuff to help drop the weight. Its helping but man is it dull. Good god. Now i wont knock that stuff forever, but i need to go cold turkey right now or I just wont stop. This is killing me. My body just wants to be fat so I have to train it. My mind and my heart are happy but my body thinks this is bullshit. Hey body... you want a chicken wrap with no salt, cheese, or dressing? NO I DONT! OKAY! I WANT TO GO HOME AND MAKE A HUGE SERVING OF PENNE COVERED IN A BEAUTIFUL TOMATO AND GARLIC SAUCE AND TOPPED WITH JUST THE RIGHT COMBINATION OF MOZZARELLA AND ASIAGO! THATS WHAT I WANT OKAY?!?! okay... but all we have is a chicken wrap... it has pickles! You like pickles... Fine I'll eat the fuckin chicken. Of course after that my body gets the kick start of protein and green colored healthy vegetables and forgets about being hungry or wanting shit food and we continue with our day... but none the less! REVOLUTION!

After work today I went 2 blocks over and watched the new Danny Boyle film "127 Hours" about a hiker for falls in the desert and gets his arm caught underneath a boulder. James Franco is in it and, as always, he is wonderful. It was a tough movie to watch due to how graphic it gets. The big plot point raised over and over again is will he survive. Of course in the opening credits it says the film is based on his book. So obviously he survives. Sorry to ruin that for you. But there is still alot of suspense. For me I had an Idea of what was going to happen. If you want to see this movie I say read nothing more about it and just go and see it. Dont read a synopsis or review. just go. The blinder the better. As a person who is afraid of falling AND claustrophobic, It was a very hard movie for me to watch. This is the number one reason why I havent (yet) watched "buried" with Ryan Reynolds. a 90 minute film shot in a coffin. I used to be afraid of being buried alive, and i realize that my fears are now simply the helplessness of a situation and the claustrophobia. So basically I will try my best not to get stuck anywhere lol

Toronto is a great city and for somebody who loves theatre, there isnt really a better place to be in canada. It hasnt started to feel like home yet though. I think it will once I have my own place, but right now as I am subletting a room it hasnt quite settled yet. The job helps. My bosses asked me yesterday... so when can you work? and I said... I dunno... All the time? What would I say? No sorry I cant work that day, i have to much nothing to do! Tickets for a certain musical about a lion come on sale tomorrow so it will be nice to work at a job thats finally super busy. Busy helps make the time fly by.

SO. The plan this week? work 40 hours. See 4 live comedy shows. and 1 European film about a young student named Harold. I shall write about all of it in the best detail I can.

I just learned that my current weight is the same weight that Tyrannosaurus Rex babies loose their feathers and hair. Thats a fun fact! Ironically when I first got to this weight, I became hairless as well. Interesting. I also have small arms and a huge head. I dont want to ruin it for anybody... but i MIGHT be a dinosaur.


Thanks for reading! Tell your friends!


Mike