Thursday, December 9, 2010

December 9 - Cocaine Duffle Bag

Almost 100 people read my blog today. Who are these people?

Lets talk about flights. I love to fly. I enjoy the experience. I don’t really mind waiting and I often have a good time. One time when I went through security I was stopped because my bag had trace amounts of narcotics on it. I have never done a drug in my life so I had no nervous feelings about it. And hey, I figure if im going to try a finger up my bum it should be from a security guard I don’t know at the airport.

What bothers me is the fact that flights are so expensive in Canada. I found a flight from Buffalo to Las Vegas for $80! That’s a 6-hour flight! A flight from Victoria to Vancouver is a minimum of $120. That’s a 16-minute flight! They don’t even have a drink service. 8 minutes in they walk through and give you a mint! That’s it. But holy hell, a flight across Canada at this time of year is nearly $500, before tax, ONE WAY. That’s obscene. No wonder the furthest east (in Canada) I had ever been was Winnipeg… and that’s when I was 4 days old! If it were more affordable, maybe we would travel more! Something to think about Air Canada.

Today I got an E Card from my Member of Parliament. It had my name on it… but I think he sent them out to everybody. I thought what we had was special. Turns out im just a number to him! IM JUST A WHORE! GOD DAMN YOU KEITH MARTIN!!!!

Side Note: Now that I live in Toronto, Keith Martin is actually no longer my MP… see Keith? I can see other people too you son of a bitch!

This year at the Stratford Shakespeare Festival, I know 4 people starring in the shows. I think that’s wonderful! Its nice to be able to see friends on posters. I realize this comes out as insincere, but I mean it. That’s really all I had to say about that.

The Toronto production of Billy Elliott just did its final casting and I know a lot of you had high hopes… but… they cast a child as Billy. I know right!?! BULLSHIT! A guy I work with asked why I didn’t do the dancer audition for the show. Now to some of you, who have seen my photos, seen me perform, or know me as a person will attest to the fact that when you look at me, not one part of your brain screams DANCER. I don’t foresee an audition where the big wigs stop the audition to ask who that husky un coordinated sweaty man in the back is. I am happy to consider myself graceful, a quick learner, and an excellent mimic… but a dancer? No I don’t think so. Plus, even if the choreographer saw me on his LSD day and cast me, that means I would have to dance 136 performances!

Let me be totally honest with you. One time I got out of a chair to fast and kinked my neck. Cast in Billy Elliott? Id give myself a week!

I had hoped that some folks who are agents and managers would take the suggestions of my friends and come out and see my show last night. I don’t think they did. It would be so nice to have an agent. Or at least somebody to help me navigate the waters of this town, the casting calls, and all of the other stuff going on. I don’t think it will happen despite a few friends saying they would get me meetings. So far its been nothing, but that’s okay. 1 month down. A life time to go. We shall see!

Well its that time folks. Time for me to sleep. Im going to go and view some apartments and see what I can find tomorrow! Maybe the landlord will show up or deem me worthy enough to live in their apartment! We shall see!

Thanks for reading!

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